Top ‘O The Mornin’ to you Bachelors! It’s that time of year for good luck and four-leaf clovers, and little red-headed child/men to run amok and grant St. Patrick’s Day wishes! And it looks like all my wishes have come true!! (Well, maybe not all of them, I’m still terribly lacking in the womb region. You can hear the ocean in there if you tip me right! LOL!!!!!!) That’s right! I’m MARRIED NOW!!!!!! (Pause for thunderous applause!) Oh Bachelors, I found my pot of gold at the end of the rainbow! This might be it for us, as I need to devote all my energy to being the best wife I can be. Don’t fret, you’ll always be my first! Or you would’ve been if you would’ve called me! Guess you don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone, (like Janet Jackson said)! Gotta go! Wifely duties await! EEEEEEEE!!!
Big Shamrock Kisses!
Happy Valentine’s Day Bachelors! In between flossing the candy-coated depression from my teeth and guzzling another pink martini, I thought I would take a minute to read some of your delightful well-wishes for this utterly delightful holiday. DELIGHTFUL! Really…I’m not bitter, I LOVE V-Day! All the candy hearts and expensive meals, and drunken unprotected baby-making NOT happening in my bed…yep. Anywhoo, have a super sweet day…I’ll just be hanging out…alone…waiting…for YOU!
Lookout Bachelors, Piper’s back with her cure for what ails you!]]>
Hello again bachelors! I’ve got a great way to help you shed those 2008 extra pounds! Wink Wink!! Don’t worry, no one can hear you scream, so we can be as loud as we want! Kinky!